As I sit here on my bed of my new house I bought about a year ago; I have to say, that I have been treating this blog like most relationships these days, I have NO CONSISTENCY, whatsoever! I literally write 3 posts a year and wonder why no one cares about my blog.
So, WTF have I been up to? Well, if anyone actually searched or came on this site, you would’ve noticed that it was down for a while. I had no idea why, so I asked one of my good friends to help me; she pretended like she was, but she really wasn’t. I still love her though. I ended up figuring it out myself, then had someone else perfect it. I also changed the name to “Who Is Kay James?” because, I’m not offering advice, so MeetUpAdvice wasn’t conducive to what the site was about.
I moved out of the city and into the suburbs, because I needed peace. It was one of the more terrifying decisions ever made on my own. That move was stressful and it taught me a lot more about friendships, family and relationships. Of course, I’ll write about it.
The relationship between my ex husband and I is actually healthier, I had to put him on child support to show him that I’m not f*cking around. It’s not that I couldn’t take care of my son on my own or with minimal monetary support from his dad, I can, I’ve been doing it, but why should I HAVE to? My situation has changed, I now have a mortgage and my bills are different from when I was living in our apartment in Brooklyn. Of course, I was the bad guy and the typical “black female” for doing so, but I did what I had to do. It humbled him, he’s definitely a better person than he was before and now we have come to an agreement and don’t have to deal with courts anymore, but if it gets out of hand, I will do what I have to do again. Of course, I will write about this journey, because I believe people make child support a bad thing and also a minority issue or a poor persons issue, when rich people, celebrities and people of all colors go through this; it’s not a punishment to take care of your child, but that’s unfortunately, how some see it.
I also lost my Father to cancer this past summer. That taught me that, people really do sh*t for attention. My sister (my father’s daughter, not my mom’s and not all of them, just one) would post things when he was alive, how she missed him, how she grew up with him, how she was the only one taking care of him, how she never hear from family members; yet he needed more clothes in the nursing home, she didn’t send; he also, needed his family members to visit him, which she had a list of people who weren’t allowed to visit him or call to check up on him. When he passed she did the same thing, wrote a post about how great she was to him, but forgot to include that she didn’t make arrangements for him and the person she wanted to alienate the most, me, came in and figured it out…. I don’t know if I’ll write about that.
Something also rocked my family to the core, changed our whole lives. Made me think that no matter how old you get, all relationships have the same issues. From age 12-70 men do the same sh*t. Older people in relationships aren’t protected from things that younger people are going through, just because of age. I don’t think, minds are young or old anymore, people do, what the fuck they wanna do. It’s that simple. Relationships these days are like playing Russian Roulette; Expect the worse, but hope for the best…. I’ll need permission to write about that! LOL.
I have a lot to write about. My life has totally changed and I want this to be my public diary, because we are all going through some sh*t and if I can help you get through your sh*t with a smile or if I can walk with you through my stories, then I’m here for it!
Consistency is key! ❤