“DISCRETION DOESN’T MEAN HIDE YOUR LOVE LIFE – IT MEANS BE WISE ABOUT THE INFORMATION YOU SHARE & WITH WHOM YOU SHARE IT WITH”
It took me a while to fully understand what the above quote meant (years to be exact!). I used to think public displays of love via social media was a good way of letting the world know that you are committed to someone and that person is committed to you. If it wasn’t done, that was a good indication that the person was hiding you or hiding something. Right?
My way of thinking was slightly off. Public displays of love via social media does not mean that someone is in a committed, tight-knit relationship. I’m not saying that public displays of love via social media is wrong. I love seeing people in love, but a lot of people don’t. Some people prey on your relationship to fail; it might be an open window to hate-on-you and sometimes people hate so hard, it can ruin the best relationships.
So, let’s talk about it.. I’ve seen people in relationships post things about their partner with a beautiful caption. There are so many people who are following you that will hate the picture, but still hit the “like” button. Then, go out their way to investigate the person in the picture just to hurt you. I’ve seen so many times where people say that they’ve received inbox messages from total strangers about their significant other. Why do people go out their way to bring you down? Why can’t people let you be happy?
I don’t have the answers to those questions. Sometimes we open the door to let people in parts of our lives that, sometimes, are not meant to share. Especially if your relationship isn’t stable enough to be shaken up.
I’m not saying that it’s not OK to share your happiness with the world and that you should let your followers dictate what you do or don’t post, I’m just saying be cautious. Everyone isn’t rooting for you, some people are rooting against you…
The people who are rooting against you are waiting for that one day, you put up the slightest post indicating something is going wrong in your relationship. You can always spot those people out. They’re the ones who, out of nowhere, try to console you in your comment section. They even root you on, but has never commented on your pic of you and your partner, EVER! They’re like those people who never compliment you when you look good, but can always tell you when you look bad. My mother always told me to stay away from people like that.
Some of you are probably reading this saying to yourselves, “sometimes they are hiding something!” Yes, they can be, but I’ve seen thousands of pictures posted by a boyfriend/girlfriend yet, they’re messing with everyone in Brooklyn. EVERYONE!
There’s no manual to “not looking stupid in relationships” but you can reduce the probability of all your followers knowing you were a fool.
I’ve seen people making fun of those who go on dates, but only post pictures of the two plates of food or two champagne glasses, or even the ones that take a picture of holding hands. People make fun of that, but if that relationship failed, would you even notice?
A lot of people try to compare their relationships to celebrity couples, but no one knew Jay-Z was dating Beyoncé for years and we still don’t know what sparked the fight in that elevator. I’m just saying…
It’s OK to post who you enjoy spending your time with, just make sure that it’s secure and be sure that you’re ready for all that comes with it. Don’t let the pettiness of others ruin something that makes you happy, but at the same time, use discretion on what you post so people aren’t able to steal your joy. If things are going bad in your relationship, don’t let the world know because they are waiting to make a mockery of it. We are all guilty of it, I look at people’s page and say, “wasn’t she drunk in love yesterday? Now she’s sober and wanna cut his balls off?!” and chuckle, then call someone else to look at it, “Guurl, go on Instagram and look at this!”
No ones perfect, I’ve had my share of times where I put things up about my relationship out of frustration. In hindsight, I realize that, it opened doors to those people who thought that I was vulnerable, so they tried to take that opportunity to try to get with me. Others may use the same opportunity to get with your mate. They’re following you, waiting for the right time to get with your man/woman.
Be careful, happiness doesn’t need to be displayed. But if you must, be sporadic with it. Especially if you’re an emotional person. Everyone does not want to be on your emotional roller-coaster.
As for the ones that don’t know if they’re in a relationship, make sure you know what’s going on before you post. There’s nothing worse than posting someone that’s not yours.
“When you let the world in your relationship, the world will try to end your relationship”
*Note to Men* Do NOT use this post to convince your girlfriend not to post pics of you because you don’t want your OTHER girlfriend to see! Ladies don’t do it either…. LOL